It's Fall and I am in a place of transition.

I am changing with the seasons.
This past winter was a time for me to go inside and look at who I am and the influences in my life. A major change came in the passing of my Father. I spent a little time looking at my relationship with him and the lack of relationship before his passing.

You see I made a consious decision to not have my parents in my life because they, in my opinion, were angry, bitter and judgemental with everyone around them. I was brought up with many of the same morals that I am sure you were. Don't cheat, lie, steal, don't do drugs, don't drink to excess, treat other as you would want to be treated, help others, be respectful, etc. However I noticed as I became an adult, my parents started living their lives a little differently than they raised us. I knew when and why the changes began, but I still had a difficult time accepting them. I actually have had a harder time accepting that my parents did not follow the rules that they were so quick to enforce and that the very things we were punished for with what was called a firm hand, somehow didn't matter now that we were adults.

You see I had not been a very obedient child, one might even say I was challenging. I did almost all of those things that I previously mentioned and was usually punished for it. Soap in the mouth for lying, burned finger tips for stealing, a belt, paint stick, etc. for the many other offences, but what hurt the most was losing my Dads trust and respect for the offence of having sex too young and before marriage. The words he spoke to me when I was pregnant with my oldest son hurt more than any beating I ever received from him. "You are like a cat in heat.", those words etched into my brain. All I could think was that is how he saw me and what little value I held in his eyes. To be told in essence that you have little or no value greater than a stray animal is hurtful and degrading to any human being, even more so from a parent to a child.

I tried hard to get past that day and what he said, but as the years went by I realized that words said can't be unsaid. I don't know if my Father ever changed his opinion of me and honestly I wish I could say I didn't care but the truth is I did care. I cared right up until I heard that he was dying of stomach and prostate cancer and that he didn't have long. It was at that point I realized that my father did the best he could with the tools he had and I chose to forgive him for not knowing any better. I went to see him the day before he went into hospice and helped my sister and daughter care for him. I also sat with him in hospice and was there when he died. I wanted him to know that no matter what... He was loved and would be missed.

My Dad was a huge part of why I am who I am today. You see I do my very best each and every day to be the best version of me I can be. I have strong morals and I am a good friend, wife and mother. I continue to learn something everyday and work on healing the wounded child within me. Now, today, I can say I have forgiven him and that I am grateful for all that I learned because of who he was.

My Mother you ask? Well, that is still a work in progress.

How things have changed...

 So much has happened, where to begin?

I have found a new modality, no a way of thinking, a way of living and there is no going back now!

Access Consciousness TM make me shine in a way that I have a hard time explaining. I am a different, happier, more blissful person today and that is due to first having my Bars run and then training to teach this fantastic tool.

Learning a new way of thinking that isn't driven by other people's thoughts, feelings and opinions is a possibility for everyone. It is such a different possibility to live this way.

Access mantra is "All of life comes to me with ease, joy and glory!".
Saying this statement 10 time in the morning and ten times at night can start changes occuring in your life. Try it for a week.

Oh My....Goodbye Summer and Fall too!

Wow...The time seems to have flown by.

We had a long list of  projects too accomplish this summer and I am happy to say we accomplished most of them. We hadn,t planed on doing as much as we did this summer but, our daughter asked if she could have her wedding on our property in August of 2013.

We added a few flower and vegtable gardens, reworked the existing flower beds and added many new fruit tree's. Also stained the decks, painted the barn, added a bunkie with attached screen room and had a ne roof put on the house.
Inside almost every room has been painted. The main bath is being refreshed with new flooring and a toilet.

Almost the end of May....

Well we have been busy this month looking at houses. While some were diamonds in the rough, some were just plain rough. Since we had bought, renovated and sold more than once in the past, our wants and needs were clear. You would think that would make the task of finding our next home easier, well not really. What it in fact did for us was make it perfectly clear that our "perfect" home didn't exist.

Skipped Over April?

Well April has come and gone.

We have sold our current home and are looking for our next home. We have seen a lot of homes, one possibility and many more still going to be seen. I am very particular about what I want and will know it when I see it. So the search goes on. Did I mention we have to be moved out of our current house in 6 weeks. Yep, we have to find and move in 6 weeks. No pressure!

That aside I have had a good month. I attended and completed my Level I and Level II Reiki training and I am now a Certified Reiki Practitioner. I still have to do my Crystal Therapy Course, maybe once I move. I am going to be doing Reiki Sessions for a while and I am looking to do some volunteer work at the local hospice.

I have to admit this is a very frustrating process. Even though I know everything will work out just fine, it`s still a little unnerving. I put in my order to the Universe and my Angels I am sure are working on it but, this feeling of  helplessness is rough. We know what we want in a home and property and I feel sure that we will get it.

Our lives have changed completely over the past 10 years. We have finally found each other in a new way and are continuing our personal journey`s of self exploration. We`ll keep you posted.

Oh Where, Oh Where did March go?

March has gone and Spring has sprung and sadly we Have not sold our home nor found a new home yet.We have seen many, but none have lived up to our wants and needs. So the search continues for our next home.


I guess you could say that I am looking for direction in my life. ( Hence the pic to the right)


In the the last month I have begun a search for my life's purpose if you will. I have taken an intro to crystal healing and am two weeks away from taking my Reiki Level I course.

I found that I am being drawn to the Crystals and I feel they will be a great addition to my Reiki healing. I haven't been this excited about the prospect of doing something in a very long time and suffice it to say I deserve it and it's long over due. I believe everyone would benefit from either or both of these treatments and I plan to continue until I become a Reiki Master Teacher. I have always believed we are put here for a reason and this is part of mine.



Quartz Cluster

This quartz crystal reminds me of the Superman movie. The hubby and I went to a Gemstone and Mineral show in Paris Ontario this past weekend to get some crystals for me to use and low and behold he managed to find some for himself too!

Does that mean I will quit decorating and renovating? Heck No!
The hubby and I enjoy working on projects together too much for that. We have a storage locker with a bunch of projects that we will begin to transform once we get moved, but for now they sit patiently in the dark waiting. Tables, chairs, dressers, hutches and much, much more. We will be selling some and keeping some.


As for now North, South, East or West? I'll let you know when we find out.

A Weekend of self discovery...

This past weekend my daughter and I attended a local Alternative Wellness Fair in our town.  This is something I have been drawn to for quite some time. Although I am not religious I am very spiritual and have very strong values and beliefs.

At the A.W.F I had a Chakra Balancing done by Fran from www.Bearelements.ca, followed by an Angel Card reading and lastly a reading done by Shanel from http://fourweeangels.weebly.com. I am not going to go into a lot of detail, but it has reinforced my beliefs and encouraged me to begin training and learning about Reki and to further my understanding of Angel Card Readings. I am so excited, I am going to be doing my first Reki training THIS weekend.

I have felt what some might say is a calling. I simply believe that I am being drawn to a simpler life. I want to strengthen my connection to others and to the world around me. I guess that is where my wanting to find a small hobby farm has come from.

I believe we need to go back to a simpler time when communities took care of each other. A time when money was a by product, not the be all and end all. I hope to make a farm, a home, a welcoming place for friends old and new to come together and share in good times and love. Through this place I want to help provide fresh produce, eggs, chicken and perhaps some other wellness inducing products and services to help people to heal themselves, to honor themselves and to love themselves.

I have heard older people speak of the ""rough patches" in their relationships and their lives before. Well, last night I was watching Oprah's new show and she was talking to Tony Robbins. They were talking about how he called those times when things were not going your way, when things seemed all bad and even hopeless as "Winter". This is not something that can be prayed or wished away. It's something that you must go through. You must live through it, learn from it and evolve from it's lessons. Wow, isn't that interesting.

So the the "rough patches" are our Winters which we have to go through, but why?

We all know what follows Winter is..... Spring and Spring is a time of renewal. A time when we review what we learned from the Winter. So we can then better our lives.

I have had my fair share of Winters in my life. I am not bitter. I am not angry. I am not disheartened. I have been blessed with lessons that have brought me back to my inner peace. I believe we all have gifts to share and I am grateful that I am being blessed with a new Spring in my life. I can't wait to begin sharing my blessings with my family and friends, new and old.

I hope that you may see your way to your new Spring and feel free to share your lessons, it's beauty and blessings.